(This is the second of an 7-part series exploring the spiritual discipline of contemplative-action.)
How are you? Seriously, how are you doing personally within your family and community relationships? How are you doing within your role as a congregational leader? Do you feel depleted or energized? Have you become disillusioned/cynical regarding the future of the church or are you hopeful and motivated? Do you find yourself leaning on addictive behavior to self-medicate and zone out, or do you feel that you have daily/weekly rhythms that aid in you being healthy and vibrant?
Let’s be honest, serving as a congregational leader has gotten more and more difficult over the past several decades. We often hear from colleagues that they feel a sense of loneliness in their roles as clergy. I’ve personally experienced pastors brought to tears as they work hard yet watch decline in numbers, or face extreme pushback from congregants, or deal with the stress of congregational conflict. Another cause for tears is that often clergy are expected to sacrifice themselves or their families on the altar of the church. I’ve had several young clergy describe for me the tension between meeting the expectations of their congregations while also being intentional about their marriage or parenting.
How can we be effective leaders if we are struggling personally, spiritually, or relationally? Too often we fall into the patterns of disjointed or inauthentic lives. We feel pressure to put on a certain face as we strive to lead our congregations while concealing the realities that we experience within ourselves and/or within our personal lives. It’s no secret that leaders are most effective when they are healthy, authentic, transparent, and full. Being depleted, inauthentic, hidden, and empty will negatively affect our ability to lead effectively.
At Illumin8, we seek to create a collective that encourages and promotes pathways to healthy lifestyles and vibrant leadership. We’d love to hear where you find yourself these days. What sorts of practices do you espouse to care for yourself holistically? What have you found to be helpful? Where do you tend to get stuck?
“At Illumin8, we seek to create a collective that encourages and promotes pathways to healthy lifestyles and vibrant leadership.”
I will share that, in recent years, I’ve learned to spend considerable time in daily contemplative practices. I have also been intentional about my diet and exercise. I’ve struggled with food and weight issues throughout my adult life and was able to lose over 50 pounds in the past year (it did take a sabbatical to jumpstart me on a healthier path). I’ve also been very attentive lately in monitoring my use of alcohol and other means of self-medicating or zoning out. None of this has come easily for me. My wife, Karrie, and I utilize the guidance of a spiritual director and have been intentional about our spousal and parenting connections. I can honestly report that these personal disciplines have had a positive effect in my evolution as a child of God and as a congregational leader. The more authentic I am about my own spiritual development, the more I have found it aids in my ability to be a spiritual leader with others. Please understand, I am very intentional about boundaries and strive not to make things about me in preaching or teaching. However, I have found that there are opportunities when I can speak authentically about my personal journey in a way that invites others into a conversation about spiritual and holistic wellness.
We value your insights into this conversation topic. As you read this blog, what is showing up for you? We encourage you to share your reflections in the comments below, or on our forum page on our website (https://illumin8collective.com/forums/).
God bless you!
